For what it's worth.
i. Tell the truth.
So simple, so often avoided. Through a lifetime of both well-intentioned lying I realize that if you're going to do something, you ought to be okay with everyone knowing that you're doing it. If you're going to have to lie about it later, you might want to question why you're doing it and whether or not you can live with the consequences. The truth hurts in the moment. It hurts much worse when it comes out five years later.
ii. Life is not fair.
The hardest lesson I've learned. I'm the world's most impassioned egalitarian - the quickest way to make my blood boil is to show me unfairness, oppression, inequality, or injustice. Part of growing up (if I've any authority to speak on such a thing) is learning that sometimes the ends are terrific for some and terrible for others even if the means are the same. Life does not always happen the way we plan or desire. Some things are out of our control. We could work hard every day for 40 years and die hopelessly blue collar while a man next door might never have to lift a finger because of his last name. And you know what - that's okay. That's the way it is. Perhaps the better thing, if such a reality can be moralized, is to focus on the way we react to the inevitable rather than the inevitable itself.
iii. Charisma will get you places that only character will keep you.
Extroversion does not entitle you to leadership positions. It will make them more attainable, but the mark of true leadership is character. Hard work, thoughtfulness, honesty, kindness, service, etc. etc. are the things that define a leader. They accomplish much more in the long run than a witty interview joke and a smile.
iv. The older you get, the less you know.
I was certain of most things coming into college. Leaving, I am certain of few. I've spoken confidently on many things in life, given my advice freely to the masses that (I thought) yearned for it, been quick to declare this as right and that as wrong while granting welcome to all ears blessed by my genius. What I know now is that pontification is a fool's knack. I have said millions of words in my life without saying anything at all. Now, I can confidently declare that I do not have the answers. I have suppositions, inklings, and decent ideas. We'd all be wise to acknowledge our ignorance. At least I think.
v. The quickest way to fail is to be without a goal.
Goal-setting is everything. Not grandiose, ambiguous goal-setting, but specific goal-setting. If your goal is to skydive over the Alps before you die, that might not be what's best to write down on paper. Instead, make your goals saving money, making reservations with a skydiving company, and buying a plane ticket. That's what will get you to the Alps. You will never achieve anything if you're not working toward something. Setting goals is the way to get things done. Uncertainty and indecision are the leading killers of everyone's dreams.
vi. Worry makes you wrinkly.
If your energy is sitting around without anything to do, worry is a great option. If you're like most people, though, you've little energy to spare. Worry accomplishes two things: aging and misery. Instead of focusing on everything that can go wrong, focus on everything that is going right. And stop making everyone miserable. Your eyes are starting to look saggy.
vii. Other people have all kinds of ideas about who you should be. You be you.
Though the self is inextricably linked to others' opinions and perceptions, at a certain point you may decide whether or not to grant others permission to tell you who you are. You have a choice as to your own identity. You have the choice whether or not to be the nerd that everyone told you you were in middle school or the mindless babbler that everyone in high school made you out to be. Labels don't make us anymore who we are than putting a Chiquita sticker on an apple makes it a banana.
viii. Make time for the things you love.
Discover what makes you joyful. Do that. Be that. Live that.
ix. At the end of the day, laughter really is the best medicine.
Taking life too seriously makes one dreary fellow. Laughter bonds, it heals, it restores, it rejuvenates, it irons the wrinkles of worry away. A good belly laugh is the sweet molasses on the world's buttermilk biscuit. Be lifelong gigglers, my friends.
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